A dad explaining to his 9?yo daughter about someone who’s an expert in Han Dynasty pottery. Trying to get her interested in being an entrepreneur. He asks what she likes and she says “horses, dogs…” He’s trying to spin that into money-making ideas now. Selling programs from the Grand National. Become an expert –- “It’s all about knowledge” -- buy low sell high. She’s not really getting it, and good for her. He finishes his speech and she says “Can I get a dog?” The answer of course is No. “You’re at school all the time.”
31 Aug 2025
Is there anything more English than calling a baguette a “French stick”?
23 Oct 2025
“I don’t like the sound of my voice. I sound like a homosexual twat. …Maybe I am a homosexual twat.”
13 Nov 2025
Watching small children almost but not quite defeated by the door jamb. Clinging on to the side to navigate their way through, they triumph.
18 Dec 2025
Am I the cow milk backlash? Defensive, but not too defensive. I can explain; I have to explain. All our choices must be explained these days. Everyone is finding their balance point.
I drink cow milk, yes, because anything else in coffee just isn’t good, you know, and I need this one small good thing in my life –- to brighten the dark mornings, to reassure me that whatever else humanity gets up to, at least we figured out lattes –- but come on, I bike and take public transport and live in a tiny apartment, and I know I take planes sometimes but at some point you have to live a life you enjoy, and there’s an obligation, isn’t there, for parents,to not let their kids grow up insular, but it’s all a balance isn’t it, and if I could take a ship everywhere I would, or if trains were cheaper and I had the time, but what does the world expect, after all? That one guy in the woods in The Good Place, barely scraping a pass while the rest of the world burns. Just this one little thing, okay? Cow milk in my coffee.
29 Jan 2026
“Wow, it’s busy in here. Like a yoga class just let out. Is it ladies day?”
Wow, fuck you dude.
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