Trader Joe's

No EU citizenship? No problem. We'll just stay here and drink margaritas and shop at Trader Joe's...

Because yes, that is another thing I will miss. I don't shop there every week, or even every month, but a pilgrimage is definitely occasionally required because TJ's is the best place for certain things, and the only place for others. To whit:

Mini chocolate PB cups. Step aside, Reese's. If I had to choose one candy for the rest of my life, this is it.

Nuts. Plain, re-stocking things, like walnut pieces and almonds; also those sweet pecans with a spicy zip, and cashews with lime, and the smoked almonds... All the nuts. Basically.

Dried fruit. Montmorency cherries are the only thing for brownies, cookies, and my Thanksgiving stuffing, and the little Main blueberries are perfect for yogurt and weird summery oatmeal.

Dried pesto tortellini; fresh ravioli, both portobello and pumpkin.

Chocolate chips and giant chocolate bars. Baking necessities.

Will also not say no to a tin of smoked herring.

RECIPE: No-Knead Bread. No-brainer.

American Food

England is not known for its food. That is, Ottolenghi has an small empire, and I'm a sucker for meat pies and Yorkshire pudding (ie popovers), but historically the situation has been, shall we say, grim. In practice, of course, there's plenty of good food in London. But... just... not like NY. Sorry.

So I worry, sometimes, about burritos. And guacamole, tacos, cemitas, and margaritas (frozen and un-). There may be a handful of Mexican restaurants in London, but it is a way of life in NY, especially as the weather warms up (stfu California).

Unfortunately, our go-to place, our local, shut down over a year ago. Its replacement is not up to snuff. So I'm still searching (fine, CA, fine) for the perfect burrito. But as for the rest of the standbys, options are pretty thick on the ground.

Burritos. Like I said, these are not perfect. Maybe you just need the wafting scent of eucalyptus and urine. But they are acceptable, when the need arises.
Maya Taqueria
Oaxaca
Dos Toros

Cemitas. Maybe this is the year I spent in my university's cafeteria working the 8-to-midnight shift making sandwiches, but I think they are one of the world's Perfect Foods (see also: dumplings, chocolate PB cups, gin & tonics).
El Atodero
Red Hook -- barbacoa de chivo cemita, at the cart furthest west and south. I crave this thing.

Tacos:
Just go to Sunset Park or Jackson Heights. And remember: Only suckers pay more than $3/taco.

Margaritas:
Santa Fe Grill -- the food is good, if you're alright with the Park Slope stroller atmosphere. The marg is pictured above. 'Nuff said.
Habana Outpost -- the food is crap. The sunny courtyard with a frozen margarita in hand is not. Sunday nights are movie night.
Five Leaves -- the food is fantastic, if largely off-topic here, but you cannot do better for brunch than a Moroccan scramble and a grapefruit margarita.

MAP

RECIPE: Sticky Cranberry Gingerbread, if you want something besides chocolate for Christmas dessert. Pairs perfectly with egg nog ice cream.

Biscuits

I hadn't expected Recipes I Just Need Some Place to Put to become a theme, but here we are. Function before form.

From the Silver Palate Good Times cookbook.

Recent Eats IV

Baba's Pierogies
I'm basically a sucker for any kind of filling in any kind of dough. Dumplings, ravioli, bao, pelmeni, burek, whatever. And these were solid pierogies, and I'd like to go back and try the blueberry. But seriously: You want to charge almost a dollar extra for a few caramelized onions? Get over it; and bring me some applesauce while you're at it.

Sweetleaf
Once a month or so, I work a day in Long Island City (instead of Harlem). By far the best part of this experience is the morning bike ride, which takes me up through Brooklyn, over the Pulaski Bridge, and -- almost -- straight to Sweetleaf. Rocket Fuel and Voodoo Child are both [kisses fingers]. Perfect start to the day. Why they have a giant painting of Kristen Bell on the wall, I don't know.

Jacques Torres
City Bakery is of course my hot chocolate gold standard, but I certainly won't kick the stuff from JT out of bed. Nor their chocolate-covered cornflakes either.

Pizza
Living in NY means you are absolutely obligated to have strong opinions about pizza. Personally, I find it important also to distinguish between "slice joint" pizza, and "fancy" pizza. For the former, still and always, I count on Joe's. For the latter, I'm generally pretty good now with my new local, Parkside. There may technically be better fancy places out there, but there are certainly none closer. In any event, Roberta's has too long of a wait, Lucali doesn't cook their shallots, the Parkside chef used to work at Franny's anyway, etc. But life happens, and a few weeks ago I found myself at Baby Grand and in need of sustenance, so we ordered from Motorino. I gather they've built a nice little hipster business, so anticip.ation was high. But the thing is, if you're going to charge that much for a pie that doesn't really feed two not-very-hungry people, you need that pie to be great, and Motorino's wasn't even close. We had two, one with mushrooms and one with sprouts, and the toppings were sort of tasty enough, although not revelatory, but my real gripe is with the dough. It was so... doughy. Pillowy, in fact. So if that's your pizza style, vaya con dios, but it ain't mine.

Chikalicious Dessert Club
One of my many problems with living in Japan was that they weren't, as a culture, very good at dessert. I like red beans just fine, but that has to be balanced with chocolate cake from time to time, you know? In general, it always seemed to me that they were way more concerned with how desserts looked than how they tasted, and the Age of Instagram has not helped matters. So while I wouldn't say the churro ice cream cone situation is a bad one, it's definitely a Made for IG one, and if you just want good ice cream and a good churro, you're probably better off eating them separately.

The Bonnie
We recently spent a day biking around Queens, hitting up the Socrates Sculpture Park, the Noguchi Museum, and the Museum of the Moving Image. Sustenance was required throughout. And if all you need, as we did, is an airy backyard, a beer, and some fries, The Bonnie is not a bad option. ...If you can discount a certain amount of soullessness and a full-on Best of the 80s soundtrack.

Mimi Cheng's
I like dumplings. And these are good dumplings. But. I have a hard time feeling a need to bother with anything fancier than, say, $0.50 per dumpling. Just say no to gentrification, and go to Shu Jiao instead.

MAP

RECIPE: Lentil Minestrone, because ultimately, who doesn't like soup?

The Stroll

Last week, R and I walked the length of Manhattan, top to bottom, 17.4 miles. It's possible to be a bit more direct -- Google puts the straight shot at 12.2 -- but I will always choose food and views over convenience. Besides, the whole point was to spend the day doing the things we do best: wandering, eating, and taking pictures.

First stop, of course, was breakfast. We took the A as far up the island as we could, and headed straight to Cachapas y Mas for a chicharron cachapa and some passion fruit juice. I'd already forced R to skip his usual muesli, so I relented and didn't force him to walk to the very very tip top of Manhattan first. We'd tacked on some extra mileage by walking from the Times Square Q to the Port Authority A anyway, so starting the real trek from 207th St seemed... fine.

Trinity Cemetery

First thing after breakfast was our biggest elevation of the day -- straight up Fort George Hill. NY doesn't have much in the way of hills, if you don't count bridges, but those few up in Washington Heights, the Bronx, and Yonkers make up for the lack elsewhere. (We got lost trying to find the South County Trailway out of Van Cortlandt Park once, and it was brutal.)

Washington Heights is really all about the food. I wanted to keep us lean and mean (ie able to make lots of food stops along the way), so we went pretty straight through, but you could easily have a full batido-empanada-mofongo-patacon-etc-tour day up there.

Grant's Tomb

Our first real landmark was Grant's Tomb. I have a lingering fondness for this area, from when my college roommate, who's lived on Claremont for the last 15 years, let me crash on her futon the summer I came back from Japan, but I've rarely had occasion to go back since. It has just that perfect snootiness to mark the beginning of the UWS proper.

We crossed through Columbia, so I could point out where Joseph Gordon-Levitt parked his burrito in Premium Rush, then down past St John the Divine. (It's not a great movie, but there are silly bikey things, and it was New Year's Eve and I was high on officially prescribed oxycodone when we watched it.) I can't be in this neighborhood without visiting my favorite statue, of St Michael with some giraffes and a crab, lopping off Satan's head, so we sat in the garden there for a minute while we figured out our next move.

The Cannibal

We'd only split the cachapa, so lunch seemed, as it so often does, like a good next step. Also I thought a little iced coffee wouldn't go amiss, especially if we could get it with condensed milk -- like at Saiguette. I'd been there once before, and got something fancy, but this time we opted for the Classic sandwich. It did not disappoint. I'm a little sad that I'm not still getting my banh mi for $4 from the back of a jewelry store in Chinatown, but... this was really good, and we ate it on a bench in Central Park. Sometimes I can't hate gentrification.

That fueled us through the park and, after The Classiest Bathroom Break at Lincoln Center, on to Gotham West Market. My intention was to just do a quick walk-through and check the place out, but then it was mid-afternoon, it was mostly empty, and I saw a blackboard advertising slushie cocktails. Sold. One icy negroni later and I was ready for anything -- including the High Line. (We did maybe 30 blocks of Central Park, plus the High Line, but I refused to do any other non-street walking. The whole point was Manhattan, after all. Walking down the West Side Greenway, for instance, only shows you the West Side Greenway, and I've seen it plenty on my bike.)

By the time we hit ground again in the West Village, we were starting to flag a bit. It was time to bring out the big guns, aka Taiwanese shaved ice. Green tea and black sesame drizzled with condensed milk and topped with strawberries. Oh, and we got a Double Decker at Myers of Keswick, because for some reason we'd stayed up two hours late the previous weekend talking about chocolate bars. Next three miles were nuthin'.

We ended down by the water a bit after 6, not much the worse for wear. I'd done this walk once before, with 20ish other people, and that was much harder than doing it with just the two of us. Going at our own pace, deciding where we wanted to stop as we went, made the whole thing a lot easier.

I debated finishing things off with a beer on The World's Best Free Boat Ride (ie the Staten Island Ferry), and if there'd been good food next door to the terminal on the other side... Well, it still might have been nice, but we opted instead to just use the bathroom and go home. Which is to say, home to our shiny new local delicious pizza place. And beer.

MAP

RECIPE: Pasta alla Norma, furthering the Mark Bittman obsession that began when I picked up a free copy of How To Cook Everything Vegetarian on a stoop in Park Slope.

Recent Eats III

Some of these eats are not really "recent" anymore. But that's the way it goes. If I posted them in a timely fashion, I'd never have room to post anything else. (Which could be a good thing? We'll take a poll later.)

Chez Oskar
Nice local bistro. Hard to give a real review, since we were there for a set menu -- didn't get the full experience. Still, had a very tasty lamb shank and the atmosphere was pleasantly romantic.

Gaonnuri
I'd say it's all about the view, but frankly the meat was pretty good too. I mean, why have Korean BBQ on ground level when you can do it on the 39th floor, all things being equal?

Lobster Joint
I sometimes say that if I won the lottery, the only thing that would really change would be that I would eat more lobster rolls. That may not be strictly true, but the point stands. In any event, since I'm unlikely to either win the lottery or move to Maine, I do the best I can with what I have. The $12 slider special at Lobster Joint helps.

Midwood Flats
This is a recent eat in the sense that it is always a recent eat, since this place is directly across the street from our apartment. We were suspicious of it at first, I don't know why, but the switch flipped as soon as we went in. A duck torta with a fried egg on top may not be the only path to my heart, but it'll certainly get you there. The great beer selection can certainly come along for the ride.

Parkside Pizza
Lamb sausage pizza, olive pizza. Promising-looking cocktails.

Oaxaca Taqueria
This place fills a very particular need: Close enough to swing into before BAM and pick up food that we can eat while we see a movie. There isn't a lot of competition in this category, but I'm satisfied with Oaxaca for now. Their flavors are good, but as is so often the case they suffer a bit with layout. People eat their burritos from one side or the other, so ingredients need to be layered, like in a proper paté. You can't have one end be sausage and the other end potato. Take pride in your burritos! This is especially an issue when you're sharing burritos back and forth, as R and I tend to do.

Grindhaus
This place was on my "to try" list for a while. Sadly, it did not make the jump to any kind of recommended list. It's not that the food was bad, but it wasn't mind-blowing, and I am extremely unwilling to pay, for example, $23 for a teacup-sized portion of non-mind-blowing gnocchi.

Brooklyn Bell's The Local
It's 60F; it's February; it's ice cream time. Prospect Heights has no shortage of ice cream, with Ample Hills on Vanderbilt, Blue Marble on Underhill, and now The Local on Classon. I'll make an argument for any of them, but this latest addition may currently have the largest portion of my heart. They make only very small batches -- a tub or two at a time, and then it's on to something else. When we showed up the options were: vanilla, black lava caramel, banana bread, bananas foster (an unplanned bananza, apparently), some kind of pecan brittle with pretzels and rice krispies (I don't remember the exact name, but I had it, and it was good)... and three other things. Sorry, not great reportage here. But the owner/ice cream creator served us -- I think it's basically just him and his wife running the place -- and we came away with an impression of a very short supply chain and deep attention to detail.

And a special shoutout to Trader Joe's peanut-butter-filled pretzels, the ones with salt: my constant office companion.

MAP

RECIPE: Mushroom Moussaka. A misleading name, because only some of the lamb is replaced with mushrooms, yielding a slightly lighter, cheaper, healthier dish.

Recent Eats II

Tooker Alley
I love Tooker Alley. Perfect cocktails, cozy atmosphere, breezy backyard, convenient location... This is the place that finally convinced my father that Brooklyn wasn't such a backwater after all.

Hot Bird
If Tooker is my cocktail bar, Hot Bird is my beer bar. Like Tooker, there's great seating both inside and out-, though Hot Bird ups the ante by offering a firepit in winter. I went with a few friends last week and, ignoring the taco stand in the yard, we ordered in from Nacho Macho Taco, then capped things off with a few fork-toasted s'mores.

White Tiger
Trying to get into Chuko? Long line and you're not sure it's worth it? Frankly, you're probably right. I am uninspired by Chuko's noodles. Luckily there's this new Korean place just up the block that serves similar soups, in addition to bibimbap and all that. I was quite satisfied with my ramyun.

Jin Ramen
Currently my favourite traditional ramen place (not to be confused with my favourite un-traditional ramen place, Bassanova -- get the green curry). I couldn't stop myself, several times during the meal, from commenting on how fucking good it was.

Bar Corvo
I used to rate Bar Corvo fairly high. This was maybe the fourth or fifth time I've been, and I'm not sure if we got an off night or if they're slipping. I had the lasagna, which I've had before, but it seemed underseasoned. Still a nice atmosphere and all that, and it certainly wasn't bad, but I'd gotten used to having this fantastic Italian bistro in my back pocket, and now maybe I don't anymore.

Butter & Scotch
Trekked up here with some friends after building up an appetite ice skating in the park. The more traditional cocktails weren't up to nearby Tooker Alley standards, though the existence of hot and milkshaked options makes up for it. The s'mores pie is definitely as good as it should be.

Luigi's Pizza
I don't know if I don't like grandma pie, despite continually thinking that I will, or if theirs isn't great. That said, their regular slices are great. I've eaten a lot of pizza in Park Slope, and this place is the hands-down the best for your standard New York Slice.

Russ & Daughters Cafe
This was our annual mother-daughter birthday (mine) lunch. I had the break-fast martini, and we shared plates of herring, sable, and latkes, all excellent. There's always a wait, I gather, but my mom put our names down and we wandered the neighborhood until they texted us. Painless, and certainly worth it.

Saiguette
Desperate lunch times on 135 St and Malcolm X Blvd lead to desperate measures. Yes, I am willing to walk this far if it gets me a decent sandwich. And I did. And it was.

Dizzy's
As much as I can, I try to give R the full American experience. Essential to that is: the diner. Growing up in suburbia, going to the diner is what we did. Driving anywhere, diners are where I'll head. No place does perfect rye toast with melting butter and sunny-side-up eggs like a diner. Find me a diner that serves real (not from a can) corned beef hash with that, and I will never leave. (My other go-to order is a tuna melt on rye with a chocolate egg cream.) In Brooklyn, our diner options are limited; it's pretty much Tom's or Dizzy's. I took R to Tom's on his first visit to NY, for the atmosphere. Unfortunately the pancakes & etc didn't live up to the hype, so thence forth I take all my diner needs to Dizzy's. It's still got the greasy spoon thing going on, but with quality food to back it up. Also our waiter was extremely informed about James Bond, and would have stood their talking to us about the finer points all afternoon, if we hadn't had to leave to actually get to our showtime.

MAP

RECIPE: Eggplant Dirty Rice, an easy, flavourful weeknight meal.

City Bakery

In this life, there are a few perfect combinations. Me & R. Blueberries & Corn Chex. Avocados & salt. Chocolate & peanut butter. Chocolate & pretzels. Chocolate &... a lot of things, actually; specifically, for our purposes today: City Bakery's hot chocolate and pretzel croissant.

Now, I'm a big fan of pretzels generally. Everyone has their defining snack food, and pretzels are mine. I also believe that there is something sacred about a really, really good croissant. So combine those two things in all their buttery, flaky, salty glory, and pair the result with the thickest, richest, most chocolatiest hot chocolate in the world, and it's pretty hard to beat.

I should note that City Bakery also has a very decent savoury food buffet, not to mention some excellent cookies and other pastries. Or so I'm told. The pretzel croissant-hot chocolate combo has always inoculated me against all other temptations. If you're in the neighborhood (of City Bakery or any of its Birdbath offshoots), it's hard to go wrong.

I should further note that this is one of the only things -- actually the only food thing I can think of -- where R and I differ. He claims their hot chocolate is too thick and sweet. I counter that he is insane, and it is everything anyone could ever want from hot chocolate. If you're looking for cocoa, open a packet of Swiss Miss.

February is the perfect time to visit because it's the Hot Chocolate Festival. Every day, in addition to the standard, they offer another, different flavor. Some are more tempting than others. I'd recommend going with a friend, and getting one of each so you don't feel you're missing out.

City Bakery gets crowded, but if one person waits in line and the other scouts around upstairs, there's usually enough turnover to find a seat by the time your hot chocolate arrives. Oh, and do say yes to the marshmallow.

MAP

RECIPE: Cacio e Pepe, because it sounds basic, but this is one of those times when the ingredients add up to way more than the sum of their parts.

Red Hooking

I love my neighborhood. I love all of Brooklyn, really, although I don't put it into practice much out in Canarsie or whatever. But there's only one neighborhood I go to for no other reason than to sit, and be, and soak it all in: Red Hook.

Red Hook is the Land Time Forgot. Even as distilleries and raw chocolate artisans and cocktail bars continue to pop up, and even with the presence of Ikea and Fairway, the extremely limited public transportation keeps it just a little slower, a little more relaxed. It's like a tiny corner of New Orleans in NY. (Insofar as that's possible, which isn't very, but still. As close as we get.)

Half the time, all I do is ride to the end of Valentino Pier, or the one behind Fairway, and stare at the water. For cheap, very local thrills, you could do a lot worse. The waves lap, boats go by, the Statue of Liberty stands.

...That said, there's plenty to actually do, so long as you have an interest in food, drink, entertainment, or art.

Food

Every weekend, Spring, Summer, and Fall, the vendors park around the southeast corner of the Bay St/Clinton St intersection. There are tamales, pupusas, cemitas, tacos, fresh juices... All of the trucks are good; none are expensive. My personal favorite -- and one of the few things I actively, specifically crave, is the barbacoa de chivo cemita from the white truck furthest south on Clinton St. They do taco versions too, and a few other things, but something about this cemita is just so perfectly balanced. I can't resist. Though I will often accompany it with a watermelon juice from the truck furthest west on Bay, and then pick up some tamales from the somewhat shabbier truck furthest east. (They freeze and steam up very well.)

Hometown BBQ also deserves a mention, but be warned: The line can be long, and by the time you get to the front there may be very little meat left. This is especially worrisome because the beef rib is so good, and you don't want to have to settle for the smoked turkey -- which I guess is fine and all, as smoked turkey goes, but I just don't get very excited about cold cuts. If you've planned poorly though, you can always comfort yourself with the bloody mary, which comes garnished with crispy, carmelized bacon. As for the rest: sides are as expected, which is to say: good to have on the side, but uninspiring. The usual bbq story. Only Fette Sau's beans are worth it all by themselves.

The Good Fork. Full disclosure: I haven't been here in several years, but last I checked it was a very fine, intimate restaurant, worthy of a special date night.

Steve's Authentic Key Lime Pies: What is says. None of that meringue nonsense. Though I'd recommend skipping the regular ol' pie and going for a swingle. This is a chocolate-dipped, frozen pie, and it comes in three flavors, all of which balance each other well if you have enough people to share.

Thai. I've talked about the Thai places before. Either way, quality food that's not just pad thai with damp, tough chicken strips.

The Red Hook Lobster Pound. I'll admit, after eating lobster rolls in Connecticut and Maine, it's hard to get it up for rolls in NY; they're twice the price, with half the lobster. So usually what I do is buy the meat from RHLP, bring it over to my friend L's, and then we make our own damn lobster rolls. It's still not the cheapest meal in town, but it makes the experience cost-effective enough for our purposes. Which isn't to say that RHLP doesn't make good lobster rolls. I've also heard excellent things about their lobster mac n' cheese.

Baked! For all your coffeeshop, very-Brooklyny baked goods. (Think chocolate, salted caramel, pretzels, peanut butter.)

Drink

Fort Defiance serves the best Irish coffee I've ever had. Actually, until I had it here, I didn't really understand that Irish coffee could even be a thing. It's just coffee with some whiskey, right? If you, also, don't understand, then please go to Fort Defiance and drink until you do. They also have a Thursday tiki night.

If FD didn't cure your cocktail craving, or you're making a day of it, or you prefer airy to cosy, head to Botanica.

And then when you're tired of cocktails and it's hot and you just want to sit in someone's back yard and drink $2 Miller High Lifes (with lemon) and eat 2/$5 pulled pork sandwiches with sweet potato fries and chipotle mayo... Ice House was the first bar I ever went to in Red Hook, and I've been back innumerable times since. It's the definition of a lazy summer afternoon.

Brooklyn Crab. I'm putting this under drink, rather than food, because the food is crap. However. If you want a deck to watch the sun set over the water (and the Fairway parking lot), washed down with a few Narragansetts, it will serve. And the oysters are probably fine?

Whiskey & Chocolate

Widow Jane & Cacao Prieto: Whiskey, rye, bourbon, rum, liqueur, and chocolate. With some fancy chickens running around the courtyard.
Van Brunt Stillhouse: Whiskey, rum, grappa, and moonshine.
Raaka: Chocolate.

All offer tours and tastings. It is an extremely pleasant way to spend an afternoon.

Art
There's nothing better than taking in a bit of art when you're more than one sheet to the wind. Pioneer Works screens movies, hangs art on its walls, and puts on performance pieces. As with any contemporary gallery, this is all very hit and miss, but even the biggest miss can be very entertaining after a few whiskey tastings.

The Robotic Church is only open every once in a while. Sign up with Atlas Obscura, and they should keep you in the loop (with plenty of other things too). It's an odd, slightly scary performance, which they cap off with a tour of the space. An ideal event for weeding out potentially questionable dates.

Red Hook also has a variety of galleries and other art spaces. Stroll the length of Van Brunt (or at least from the Lobster Pound all the way down the pier) and you'll hit a good number.

Et cetera
Hope & Anchor does karaoke every Friday and Saturday, starting at 9. It's my second-favorite karaoke in the city (after Baby Grand). Unless it's taken over by one of those all-girl birthday parties where they never sing in groups smaller than five, usually to Katy Perry or whatever, it's a great scene. (I'm not saying you can't eat here, but why would you? I mean I have, several times, but only the breakfast items are not disappointing.)

During the summer, there's a film series at Valentino Park. Bring a blanket and bug spray, stock up on snacks at Fairway, and settle in. It's the Land Time Forgot, remember, so it never gets nearly as crowded as the other outdoor movies.

Rocky Sullivan's has a quiz night every Thursday at 8.

The pool is open every summer. Free.

MAP

RECIPE: Coconut Layer Cake, even though I've only ever made the cake part, not the frosting. It's my standard white cake recipe, because it doesn't taste strongly coconutty, just nicely sweet and moist.

To the Beach!

Another thing I will miss when we leave New York is the ability to hop on my bike and be at the beach in an hour. Granted, it's not up to (what I imagine are) Hawaii standards, but for a place I can get to from my apartment, taken together with all the other places I can get to from my apartment... it's pretty good.

Technically, you can also get to the Rockaway peninsula by train, bus, or car. None of these options allow you to explore much once you're there though, and none are quick. If you're not up for the full bike adventure though, you can always bike down and around, then hop on the subway back.

Aside from speed and convenience, the other nice thing about biking is it allows you to really appreciate your arrival at the seashore. My route goes straight down Bedford Ave until it ends at the water; from then on it's a breezy ride along the sand, hands off the handlebars and waving at the cars backed up on the Belt Parkway.

Your first item of interest, coming this way, is Floyd Bennett Field, NY's first municipal airport and now a part of Gateway National Recreation Area. I wouldn't call it thrilling, but there's something to be said for the wide-open emptiness of abandoned tarmac, dotted with occasional dilapidated hangars. There's also a campground, though you have to make a reservation and hammocks are prohibited. I have a friend who regularly spends Memorial and Labor Day down there, and apparently the proximity to the beach makes up for the lack of any real wilderness.

Across from FBF, down through the trees, is Dead Horse Bay. If you're looking for the detritus of the ages, this is the spot. Broken bottles, whole bottles, crockery, shoe leather, etc. all come burbling up from the old landfill. Etsy raw materials heaven.

Next up is the Marine Parkway Bridge. (Alternatively, you could stay on the greenway and continue to follow the Belt Parkway around to Cross Bay Boulevard, thence down to Rockaway Beach.) No matter how sticky and awful the day, crossing that bridge is a breath of fresh, salty air.

The view back towards Manhattan.

On the other side, you have a choice: left to Rockaway, straight to Jacob Riis, right to Fort Tilden. We'll get to that in a second though, because in front of you (come down off the bridge, cross the street, look right) is the unmissable milkshake truck. Sure, it serves hot dogs and whatnot, but the milkshakes are why they -- and I -- am here. $6, and you've got lunch. My personal recommendation is vanilla malt snickers, but feel free to change vanilla to chocolate and snickers to Reese's or whatever just don't leave out the malt. R has yet to take my advice on this, and it drives me nuts. He thinks the shakes are great without malt, and I think he's like someone who thinks candy corn is great because they've literally never had any other kind of candy.

Now. If you just want to sit on the beach and drink your shake and watch the ocean, carry on straight ahead and you'll be at Jacob Riis. Nothing wrong with this. As of last year they've even got a little Brooklyn Flea sort of thing and a selection of food vendors. Easy.

Hankering for that hipster haven you've heard so much about? Turn left and keep going. (To give you an idea of how far: Jacob Riis is at around 160th St; Rockaway is around 96th-86th. There's a bus that runs inland, but it's an easy flat bike ride. Or a serious trek on the sand.) Here you'll find surfers, Ripper's, and a host of other options. If you want to try some surfing, watch some surfing, sit around and drink micheladas on the boardwalk, Rockaway is where it's at. And if you did happen to take the train, this is where it drops you.

I have, however, saved the best for last: Fort Tilden. The edge of this beach is just next to Jacob Riis; you can sit there and still have access to the bathrooms and tacos. However. The best bits lie within. The beach itself offers no boardwalk, no toilets, no food, no direct access to public transportation. You might regard this as an inconvenience, until you realize that the further west you go, the emptier it gets. So if you do want to have the sand to yourself and your thoughts, Fort Tilden is perfect. If you also want to explore abandoned military buildings covered in vines and graffiti, it's even more so.

MAP

RECIPE: Tamale Pie, for those weeknight, I-don't-want-to-think-but-I-want-this-to-be-good-and-more-interesting-than-pasta meals.

Recent Eats

As a general rule, I refuse to take pictures of food while I'm eating. I'll make exceptions if it's outside and I'm alone, but don't expect any dim restaurant pics here. That doesn't mean we can't talk about the food though.

El Toro Taqueria, Fort Greene, Brooklyn:
Uninspired but decent enough tacos. R likes them more than I do. I'm definitely willing to go back and try the burritos though, as they're very reasonably priced around $7. Cheapness and the proximity to BAM will keep us coming back until something better comes along.
*Update* Still haven't gotten around to the burritos, but we did sneak some tortas into the movies last night. Again, uninspired. Not half as good as this one food truck that used to park on 9th Ave around 58th St. (Maybe it still does, but I don't work over there anymore.)

Chiang Mai vs. Kao Soy, Red Hook, Brooklyn:
Red Hook has recently seen a surge of Northern Thai restaurants. Pok Pok kicked things off a few years ago, and then suddenly there were two more a bit further south, right across the street from each other. There's a bad-blood backstory, but in the interest of fairness we visited both.
Chiang Mai came out ahead, mostly thanks to Kao Soy's whole-fish situation. It's good, this fish, but it's also the spiciest thing in the universe (and I'm backed up on this by a lot of other spicy-food people), so after a few bites it's basically inedible. To be fair, it says on the menu that it's spicy, and the waitress warned us, but... there's a line between wowza-spicy and inedible, and this crossed it. Chiang Mai also has a much more comprehensive beverage menu than you'd expect at a Thai place and, ironically, the "khao soi" I ordered was delicious.

Battersby, Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn:
This was our blowout (seriously; not cheap) third-anniversary dinner. Seven-course tasting menu plus wine pairings. Overall, they were a bit too heavy-handed with the butter, but we definitely enjoyed every course. By the time we left my stomach was aching.
Here's the rundown (obviously seasonal, so your mileage will likely vary): corn soup, dashi (both amuse-bouche), scallops, tuna crudo, fluke, honeynut squash, chestnut pasta, rabbit roulade, ginger cream (palate cleanser), almond joy sundae, nutella mousse (one of each, served together). (I had to explain to R what "almond joy" meant. Candy is one of those very country-specific things.)

Misclenanea

Miscelanea, East Village, Manhattan:
I went for the Cafe Helado con Horchata, which sounded good in theory but ultimately didn't taste quite right to me. The torta I impulse-bought for lunch, on the other hand, was great. Queso Oaxaca. There's a small bench outside the shop (it's a sort of Mexican general store in addition to a counter-service cafe), but it was full, so I biked my sandwich back over the Manhattan Bridge and ate down by the water instead. They even throw in some fresh chips and a tiny container of pickled carrots.

Brooklyn Bridge Park

Patacon Pisao, Lower East Side, Manhattan:
The patacon -- a sandwich with plantains for bread -- sounds like it's going to be the shit, and it's pretty good, but it's the chachapa that really stood out. Either way, you get enough food for two meals.

Burger Mexicano, Lefferts Gardens, Brooklyn:
Once upon a time, my neighborhood had a wonderful Mexican restaurant. It was my bar, my local, my everything. Now it's gone. It was replaced by a brighter, crappier Mexican restaurant -- and by this place, around the corner. So I really wanted to like Burger Mexicano. And it was fine, I suppose, as these things go. Bit cramped and noisy though, and not nearly enough guacamole in an order thereof. Does not replace the hole Cafe Enduro left in my heart.

MAP
RECIPE: Sock-It-To-Me Cake, which I'd never heard of before I started at the Schomburg, but which I've made more than once now, by request.

Dumplings

Disclaimer: This is a Manhattan post. There is no shortage of great dumplings in Brooklyn and Queens, but for right now let's assume you're in Chinatown and hungry.

When I moved back to NY in 2006, after a few years of living in Japan and wandering Southeast- and Austral-asia, there were a few things that made me very, very happy. Pizza and bread topped the list, but five-for-a-dollar dumplings were not far behind.

Back then there were two standard-bearers: Prosperity Dumpling and Tasty Dumpling. There were plenty of other contenders, but those two were consistently plump, juicy, and hot. Unfortunately, both have long since been discovered by the foodies. Tasty Dumpling fell victim to its own popularity by cleaning up their act, renovating, putting in shiny menu screens... and forgetting to focus on the quality of their product. Prosperity Dumpling went the opposite route, sticking to their quintessential hole-in-the-wall guns, and eventually getting shut down by the health department.

(About which: Look, they're cheap-ass dumplings. They're delicious. It's Chinatown. I'd be suspicious if they weren't being assembled in a rat-infested back alley. Save your A ratings for sushi or spend your dollar elsewhere but leave my dumplings alone!)

So what do we do now? Surprisingly, one of your best options for classic pan-fried dumplings is actually a mini chain, Vanessa's. The price has gone up -- it's now only four-for-a-dollar, but it's still hard to complain when you can feed two hungry people with a fiver. Actually, half the time I don't get the dumplings at all, because Vanessa's is also pretty good at their sesame pancake sandwiches. Crispy and oily on the outside, pillowy on the inside, and stuffed with veggies, an egg, or some roast pork, it's hard to go wrong. My only caution is: if you're in a hurry, stick to those two options. All the other dumplings are cooked to order, and I've seen other people wait upwards of 10-15 minutes for the more obscure boiled varieties.

If you have difficulty with the number of non-Chinese people in Vanessa's, you don't have to look far for more "authentic" experience. Four doors up is Shu Jiao Fu Zhou. Dumplings are the same price here, though phrased differently at eight-for-two-dollars, and they are excellent -- boiled, and much herbier and more sophisticated than their pan-fried cousins. For another two bucks you can get a plate of peanut noodles, and be very happy.

Both Vanessa's and Fu Zhou offer bags of fifty frozen dumplings to take home. And let me tell you, it is a wonderful thing to remember those in your freezer when you get home at 1am a little worse for wear. In any event, neither of these locations offers much in the way of ambient seating. If you're looking for a nicer dine-in experience, swing around west to Shanghai Asian Manor. They're soup dumplings are solid, and the Szechuan wontons some of the best. This has become my go-to brunch spots because yes, dim sum made to order is so, so much better than coagulating hollandaise.

MAP
RECIPE: Baked Risotto. I make this, on average, every few weeks. Sometimes as-written, sometimes totally stripped down and with different ingredients all together.